Please Help Ruin Daffystardust’s Disney World Vacation
As Le Blog readers who have been paying attention know, my compatriot in blogging here, Lebeau, has just recently returned from a very well planned and clearly wonderful visit with his family to Walt Disney World. Over the last few months, I have been endeavoring to create a similarly magical experience for my family and myself. The tickets were purchased (both park and Christmas party). Reservations were made for a three night stay at the Pop Century resort. Discounts were hunted down and applied. Dining reservations were meticulously acquired far in advance, then re-considered. Magical Express airport pickup was arranged. I spent several hours jimmying my family’s daily schedules for maximum enjoyment and minimal wait times over at touringplans.com.
Then I started thinking about you, dear readers.
How would my reports bring something new or different from the wonderful installments already delivered by Mr. Lebeau? Sure, they would be mine instead of his. That would make them different. My six year-old nephew will be the only kid in the group, and he’s a thrill-seeker instead of a charming princess. That’s different. A couple of new things will be open when my family visits. I could offer that. But is that enough? How can awesome be better than or different from awesome?
Then it hit me. What’s cool about the internet/social media I’m using right now?
I can give the readers at Le Blog the chance to manipulate what they end up seeing from my daily posts when they begin just one month from now. But my plans are pretty well done…and I think I’ve got a good grip on the stuff I want to see and do versus the stuff I don’t really…
What’s more fun than making somebody else do something harmless that they really don’t want to do?
So…I’m going to be asking Le Blog readers to vote on 3 different categories of activities at Disney World that are either generally considered unpopular, or that I personally suspect I would not enjoy. I will be required to participate in the option from each poll which receives the most votes. That’ll be an average of one mildly unpleasant experience for me per day.
Poll One: Unpopular Attractions
Stitch’s Great Escape
This is a widely reviled attraction which was once the more intense “The ExtraTERRORestrial Alien Encounter,” but was reworked so Disney could promote the fun animated movie Lilo & Stitch. The attraction retains none of the charm of the source film and is considered by many to still be too intense for little kids. On my first encounter with Stitch’s Great Escape, I was pleased to see the seat restraints, because I thought they might be there to keep audience members from falling out of a moving ride. As it turns out, they’re there to keep you from just rolling your eyes and leaving during the middle of the show. I know I don’t like this.
Tricera Top Spin
I was never a big fan of the Dumbo ride to begin with, so this Dumbo clone that stars cartoon-like triceratop dinosaurs just seems like lazy imagineering to me. Every time I make the mistake of boarding a spinner ride like this, I’m on it for about 10 seconds before I get bored. This just looks like a waste of time.
Journey Into Imagination with Figment
This is another attraction which has been changed, first becoming Journey Into YOUR Imagination, a take on the “Honey, I Shrunk the…” franchise. Fans of the original attraction objected, and after just two years, another update was done with the hope of recapturing them, with Figment’s name added to the title as a rather transparent come-on. Die-hards continue to hate the new version and it lost its longstanding Kodak sponsorship two years ago. I thought the original version was kind of dull and have never returned to check out the others. Don’t make me.
Swiss Family Treehouse
Can someone explain to me why Disney has seen fit to install this walk-through treehouse in four different parks? “Swiss Family Robinson” was a very popular family film. In fact, it was the top-grossing movie at the box office…in 1960. Perhaps because it wasn’t animated, today’s kids have no idea the attraction is based on a movie. Heck, I had no interest in it when I was going to Disneyland regularly as a little kid back in the early 70′s. They have since changed the theming there to promote Tarzan. Ugh. The tree.
Ellen’s Energy Adventure
Not quite as outdated as the Drew Carey thing over at Hollywood Studios, but wow. Ellen’s Energy Adventure spends 45 minutes of your park time showing you movies about energy sources. The theatre seats you’re in move around, resulting in a few minutes of cool animatronic dinosaurs, but the huge amount of time spent looking at an educational movie that is scientifically stuck in the 90′s just makes me wonder why we can’t just have more dinosaurs. Let me know when they change this to Ellen’s Dinosaur Adventure.
Poll Two: Meet ‘n’ Creeps
Some folks love spending time in the parks glad-handing with unknown actors in furry costumes when there are perfectly good rides nearby. Lebeau’s kids sure do. I do not judge them. They are the target demographic for meet ‘n’ greets. I was sorely disappointed as a kid when I shook Mickey’s hand and was positive that there was a girl under that huge head. Even as a kid I believed in traditional casting. As an adult, my relationship with the characters is the same as it is with strippers. I like seeing them around. They lend to the fun going on. But it creeps me out when they try to interact with me. I’ve actually worn similar “furry” costumes and been accosted by little kids myself. Those things are nasty.
Poll Three: Nasty Snacks
I couldn’t find a picture of the nasty no sugar added brownies they give you with a counter service meal at Disney World. Apparently those things go right in the trash.
So there you go. It is now your job to help select one thing I don’t want to ride, one thing I don’t want to hug, and one thing I don’t want to eat.
If you have any additional ideas on how to provide me with mild annoyance while I’m at “the World,” share it with me in the comments section. Please keep it clean, and remember that A) I don’t wish to be surprised. Everything has to be cleared with me first here in the comments section, and B) we’re looking for slight irritation, not utter misery.
Hopefully this will help make my trip more entertaining for everybody else.
Posted on November 12, 2012, in Animal Kingdom, Epcot, Magic Kingdom, theme parks, Trip Report, Walt Disney World and tagged meet 'n' creep, nasty snacks, ruined, unpopular attractions, vote. Bookmark the permalink. 37 Comments.