What the Hell Happened to Leelee Sobieski?

For a brief time in the late 1990’s, Leelee Sobieski was going to be The Next Big Thing.  She looked so much like a young Helen Hunt, that many people thought they were related.  At the time, Hunt was a big star.  So by the transitive property, it stood to reason that Sobieski would go one to similar levels of success.  Up through about 2001, everything seemed to be lining up for Sobieski.  But before you could say The Wicker Man, it was over.  Sobieski seemed to disappear.

What the hell happened?

Sobieski’s real name is Liliane Rudabet Gloria Elsveta Sobieski which is at least two names too many.  Clearly Rudabet and Elsveta had to go.  Whoever came up with the idea of shortening that mouthful down to “Leelee” is some kind of genius.  I named this site “Lebeau’s Le Blog” for no other reason than I liked the repetition of the “le” sounds.  I have to think the same reasoning was applied here.  It’s just so much fun to say.  “Leelee Sobieski”.  You can’t say that and not smile a little.

Sobieski has a very unusual and potentially royal heritage which she discussed with Craig Ferguson in 2005:

As a child, Sobieski was spotted by a talent agent in a cafeteria at a private school in New York.  Because apparently private schools in New York allow talent agents to troll their cafeterias.  I can’t be the only one who finds that mildly creepy.  No doubt the talent agent thought he was watching Helen Hunt’s niece as she ate her fish sticks.  Soon, she was in the running for Kirsten Dunst’s role in Interview With the Vampire.

I was in my school cafeteria in New York and a casting director asked me to meet with one of her assistants. It turns out she was casting Interview With the Vampire, but I went in only for a general purpose meeting. The irony is that I constantly think how I would love to be a vampire–not for the blood-sucking part, but for the essence, the coolness, the magical quality. Anyway, I read some lines and I was just awful. I thought acting was making a lot of expressions.

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Leelee Sobieski – Reunion – 1994

In 1994, Sobieski made her acting debut in the TV movie, Reunion.  Marlo Thomas starred as a mother who loses her child.  After dealing with the loss, her child returns.  Tears are shed.  Lessons are learned.  And based on the picture above, wings and halos are donned.

More importantly, viewing audiences everywhere learned how much fun it is to say “Leelee Sobieski”.

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Leelee Sobieski – A Horse For Danny – 1995

In 1995, Sobieski starred opposite Robert Urich in the TV movie, A Horse For Danny.

Sobieski played a precocious 11-year-old who hangs out at the race track with her uncle played by Urich.  As this is a TV movie, Danny knows more about racing than any of the adults around her including her uncle who trains horses for a living.  Danny decides to help her uncle by picking out a prize horse for him to train.

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Leelee Sobieski – Charlie Grace – 1995-1996

In 1995 and 1996, Sobieski was doing the child actor thing on TV shows.  She had guest spots on Grace Under Fire and News Radio.  She also had a regular gig playing Mark Harmon’s daughter on the crime drama, Charlie Grace.  Harmon played a cop who was kicked off the force for busting fellow cops.  He becomes a single dad and a private investigator.  9 episodes were filmed.  Only 6 aired before the show was cancelled.  

Leelee Sobieski – Jungle 2 Jungle – 1997

In 1997, Sobieski made the jump to the big screen with the Tim Allen comedy, Jungle 2 Jungle.

In the 90’s, every Disney movie was about a workaholic dad who learns to slow down before his life passes him by.  Every other movie starred Robin Williams.  The ones that didn’t, starred Tim Allen.  In Jungle to Jungle, Allen wants to marry his fiancee played by Lolita Davidovich.  But before he can do so, he needs to finalize his divorce from JoBeth Williams.  Allen follows Williams to a remote jungle to get her to sign the divorce papers.  In the jungle, he is surprised to find that he has a son who has been raised away from civilization.  Of course Allen needs to bring his fish-out-of-water son back with him to the urban jungle of New York.

Allen’s business partner was played by Martin Short.  Short is a brilliant comic actor who spent most of his career trapped in crappy movies like this one.  Sobieski played Short’s daughter who starts a flirtatious relationship with the jungle boy.

Jungle 2 Jungle was a remake of a French farce named Little Indian, Big City.  The original movie was a big hit in France, but tanked in the United States.  Film critic Roger Ebert thoroughly trashed the original film in 1996 naming it the worst film of the year.  Ebert gave the American remake a thumbs-down, but his TV co-host Gene Siskel names Jungle 2 Jungle the worst film of 1997.

Other critics agreed and reviews were uniformly negative.  At the box office, Jungle 2 Jungle was a disappointment given Allen’s track record at the time.

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Leelee Sobieski – Deep Impact – 1998

Jungle 2 Jungle was a career set-back for Allen and Short.  But for a child actor like Sobieski, it was a big deal just to land a part in a Hollywood movie.  In 1998, Sobieski appeared in Mimi Leder’s apocalyptic drama, Deep Impact.

Deep Impact was one of two movies released that year about comets destroying the earth.  Elijah Wood played a teenage astronomer who discovers the meteor on its way to destroy the planet.  He and his family are chosen to carry on the human race should civilization be destroyed.  Sobieski played Wood’s girlfriend who was not selected to survive.  Someone really needs to review the selection process.  Do we really want humanity to be carried on by hobbits?

Yes, I do feel obligated to make a hobbit joke every time Elijah Wood appears in a movie.  I’m not going to pretend to be better than that.

The ensemble cast included Morgan Freeman who paved the way for history by playing a black president ten years before we had one.  Robert Duvall lead a team of astronauts on a mission to destroy the comets before they reached earth.  Tea Leoni, Vanessa Redgrave, Maximilian Schell, James Cromwell  and Jon Favreau also appeared.

Originally, Sobieski and Wood’s young lovers had more screen time.  But after test audiences proved unreceptive to teen hobbit love, some of their scenes were cut.

The other comets-hurtling-towards-earth movie of 1998 was Armageddon.  That allowed  Deep Impact to appear Oscar-calibre simply by sending astronauts to destroy the comets instead of Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck.  Seriously, Deep Impact got credit for being more scientifically accurate than the movie in which NASA sent oil drillers into space to save the world.

Critics were less than impressed.  The movie received mixed to negative reviews.  But it performed well at the box office becoming the top-grossing movie directed by a woman.  A couple of months later, Armageddon was released to similarly mixed reviews but blockbuster box office.

Do you think there’s a porn version of Deep Impact?  If so, what would they call it?

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Leelee Sobieski – A Soldier’s Daughter Never Cries – 1998

In 1998, Sobieski starred opposite Kris Kristofferson and Barbara Hershey in the Merchant Ivory drama, A Soldier’s Daughter Never Cries.

Kristofferson and Hershey played American expatriates living in Paris in the 60’s and 70’s.  Sobieski played their daughter as a teenager when the family returns to the US.  It’s a coming of age drama based on  Kaylie Jones’ novel by the same name.  The novel was itself a fictionalized account of the life of writer, James Jones.

I love how the trailer gives Sobieski an “and introducing…” credit.  One, she had already appeared in a couple of pretty big mainstream movies.  Thanks, Merchant Ivory, but we’ve already been introduced.  Two, “and introducing…” is just so presumptuous.  It implies that this is the start of a career that will be long and impressive.  It all starts here, folks.  Expect great things.

A Soldier’s Daughter Never Cries received mostly positive reviews.  It didn’t do much at the box office.  But then again, these kinds of prestige pictures rarely do.  They are meant to be award-bait.  When movies like this get enough attention from critics and awards, they can make a tidy profit.  But A Soldier’s Daughter Never Cries, while liked, was not beloved.

For her part, Sobieski was nominated for a couple of critics’ choice awards for Most Promising Newcomer and Best Leading From a Young Actress.

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Leelee Sobieski – Never Been Kissed – 1999

Sobieski kicked off a busy year in 1999 with a supporting role opposite Drew Barrymore in the comedy, Never Been Kissed.

Drew Barrymore played a reporter sent back to high school to pose as a student for a story.  Sobieski played the nerdy girl who befriends her as she falls back into her old high school persona.

The cast included David Arquette as Barrymore’s brother who was popular in high school, Michael Vartan as her teacher and love interest, Molly Shannon, Garry Marshall and John C. Reilly.  James Franco made his movie debut.  And Jessica Alba played one of the mean girls who torments Barrymore.  Sobieski was originally offered Alba’s role but opted for the nerdy best friend because she found the role more interesting.

Reviews were mixed.  But Never Been Kissed was a hit at the box office.

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Leelee Sobieski – Eyes Wide Shut – 1999

Later that year, Sobieski appeared in a small but memorable role in Stanley Kubrick’s final movie, Eyes Wide Shut.

Tom Cruise played a doctor who wanders off into trouble after his wife, played by Cruise’s then-wife Nicole Kidman, confesses to dreaming about cheating on him.  His adventures take him into a bizarre underworld filled with secret societies and orgies in which people where masks.  So, basically, my neighborhood.

Eyes Wide Shut was originally slapped with an NC-17 rating which would mean certain death at the box office.  In order to get an R-rating, Warner Brothers used CGI to cover up some of the offending bits.  Kubrick’s uncut version was later released on video.

Reviews were mostly positive.  The opening weekend exceeded the studio’s expectations.  But audiences didn’t seem to know what to make of the movie.  It ultimately made a healthy profit at the box office, but some consider it a disappointment.

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Leelee Sobieski – Joan of Arc – 1999

Also in 1999, Sobieski starred in the TV mini-series, Joan of Arc.

Sobieski played the title role of the French girl who heard voices, lead an army and was burned at the stake for heresy.  The cast included Jacqueline Bisset, Powers Boothe, Neil Patrick Harris, Olympia Dukakis, Robert Loggia, Peter O’Toole, Maximilian Schell, Peter Strauss and Shirley MacLaine.

Joan of Arc was very well received for a TV mini-series.  It was nominated for 4 Golden Globes including a nomination for Sobieski for Best Actress.  She was also nominated for an Emmy.

As with Deep Impact and Armageddon, there was a competing Joan of Arc movie.  The Messenger told the story of St. Joan on the big screen with Milla Jovovich in the role.  Sobieski told a story about meeting her rival Joan:

“I danced with her at a premiere.  I was like, ‘Would you like to dance?’ and she said, ‘I have to go get another drink,’ She did, and then she came back and we started dancing. I felt like, ‘I’ve got to dance with her like she’s my bitch.’ Which I did.  This is Leelee the exhibitionist at work now, you understand. It was a merengue kind of tune and she was touching her face, rubbing her hair, like, ‘Oh, I’m just a little androgynistic thing,’ while I was just coldly watching her. She came up to me and I just pushed her away. Our mutual agent was there and going, like, ‘Stop–don’t do this!’ Oh, I got a real kick out of it. Not only two Joan of Arcs dancing together, but also the whole Joan of Arc lesbian intonation. I mean, I think Joan must have been a lesbian, don’t you? Milla is really nice, lovely and so gracious.”

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Leelee Sobieski – Here on Earth – 2000

In 2000, Sobieski got her first starring role on the big screen.  Unfortunately for her, it was the melodrama, Here on Earth.

Here on Earth starred future WTHH subject Chris Klein as a rich kid who comes into town and wrecks a restaurant owned by Sobieski’s parents.  He is sentenced to fix the damage he caused which leads to him and Sobieski becoming close.  Josh Hartnett completes the romantic triangle as Sobieski’s working-class boyfriend.

The most surprising thing about Here on Earth is that it isn’t a Nicholas Sparks novel.  That’s the level of melodrama we’re dealing with here.  Spoilers for a movie over a decade old, Sobieski’s character is told that she only has months to live.  Klein’s character decides not to go to college so he can spend as much time with her as possible before she dies.  Probably a good idea anyway because Chris Klein and college are not words that belong in the same sentence.

Here on Earth received the horrible reviews it deserves and flopped at the box office the way that only a movie starring Chris Klein and Josh Hartnett can.

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Leelee Sobieski – Movieline Cover – 2000

In 2000, Sobieski was far from a household name.  But she was undeniable an up and coming star.  She started appearing on magazine covers like Details and Movieline (who dubbed her a “Golden Girl”.)

In the Movieline interview, Sobieski talked about some of the parts she didn’t get.  She was turned down for Sarah Polley’s role in Go and Thora Birch’s role in American Beauty.

“I really, really wanted to do American Beauty, but the director just didn’t like me. Looking at that film now, Mena Suvari and I wouldn’t have worked together at all. She has something special about her and she did a wonderful job in the movie.”

She lost two roles to Natalie Portman:

“There have been cases where she’ll get something and I’ll go, ‘I wish I did that.’ For Star Wars, I sent them this really bizarre photo with my hair high on top of my head, but they said, ‘We’re only seeing Asians and black girls.’ Then, all of a sudden it’s Natalie Portman. I was kind of annoyed. I haven’t seen the movie, but when I saw the ads, I thought she looked great. My mom read Anywhere But Here, and she thought I should do the film, but, oh well, there’s always going to be someone who gets something you want. There are plenty of good roles to go around now. If you get everything you want, that’s not such a good life.”

I wonder if Sobieski still feels there are “plenty of good roles to go around”.

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Leelee Sobieski – The Glass House – 2001

2001 was the year the Sobieski was supposed to become a household name.  She had two thrillers lined up the first of which was The Glass House.

Sobieski played an orphan who is taken in by her rich neighbors played by Stellan Skarsgård and Diane Lane.  Bruce Dern played the family attorney who oversees the transition.  Wow, with a cast like that, you might expect more than a run-of-the-mill teen suspense film.  But if you did, you’d be wrong.  Because The Glass House is pure boiler plate.

And that’s it.  You have seen the movie.  The original cut of the film was somehow three hours long which is amazing because the trailer told you everything in just two minutes.

Reviews were negative and the movie bombed at the box office.  And yet, for some reason, a direct-to-video sequel was released in 2006 which featured none of the original cast or even the original characters.

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Leelee Sobieski – Joy Ride – 2001

The following month, Sobieski starred opposite Paul Walker and Steve Zahn in John Dahl’s road thriller, Joy Ride.

Walker and Zahn played brothers who get into trouble when they play a prank on a trucker who hunts them down Duel-style.  Sobieski played the brothers’ mutual love interest and damsel in distress.  The villainous Rusty Nail is never seen on camera, but is voiced by Ted Levine from The Silence of the Lambs.

Joy Ride was written by J. J. Abrams when he was making the transition from TV to movies.  His Spielberg obsession is in full bloom here.  The movie is meant as an homage to Spielberg’s Duel.  But sometimes the line between “homage” and “rip-off” is a hard one to draw.  This is one of those times.

Several alternate endings were shot and can be viewed on the film’s DVD.  Sobieski also filmed romantic scenes with both of her male leads.  Both scenes were cut.  I think this explains why the movie is a bit of a mess.  They were still figuring it out in the editing room.

Reviews for Joy Ride were mostly positive.  But the movie was not a hit at the box office.  A direct-to-video sequel was released in 2008 without any of the original cast.

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Leelee Sobieski – My First Mister – 2001

Later that year, Sobieski starred opposite the criminally under-rated Albert Brooks in Christine Lahti’s drama, My First Mister.

Sobieski played a rebellious teen who, against all odds, forms a close friendship with her middle-aged employer played by Brooks.

Brooks had to campaign hard to get the role.  Why doesn’t anyone in Hollywood want to cast Albert Brooks?  The guy is always fantastic!  Lahti wasn’t sure Brooks could handle the dramatic elements of the film.   She expressed similar doubts about casting Sobieski who she thought was too beautiful for the role of an outsider.

Reviews were mixed.  Roger Ebert championed the film in his review saying, “These two characters are so particular and sympathetic that the whole movie could simply observe them…The bravest thing about the movie is the way it doesn’t cave in to teenage multiplex demographics with another story about dumb adults and cool kids. My First Mister is about reaching out, about seeing the other person, about having something to say and being able to listen. So what if the ending is in autopilot? At least it’s a flight worth taking.”

Unfortunately My First Mister failed to recoup its modest budget at the box office.  Which may explain why no one wants to cast Albert Brooks despite his awesomeness.

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Leelee Sobieski – Uprising – 2001

Also in 2001, Sobieski starred in John Avnet’s TV movie, Uprising.

Uprising told the story of the  Warsaw Ghetto Uprising from 1943 in which Jews rose up against the Nazis.  The cast included Hank Azaria, David Schwimmer, Jon Voight, Donald Sutherland, Sadie Frost and Carey Elwes.

Man, Schwimmer is drifting in an d out of that accent, isn’t he?  Uprising was very well received and Sobieski was nominated for another Golden Globe for her performance.

Shortly after 9/11, Sobieski appeared on The Tonight Show where she read the following poem:

Awkward!

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Leelee Sobieski – Max – 2002

In 2002, Sobieski appeared opposite John Cusack in the drama, Max.

Cusack played a fictional art dealer who serves as a teacher to a young painter named Adolph Hitler (played by Noah Taylor).  Sobieski played Cusack’s mistress.  The movie speculates about what might have been if Hitler had been accepted by the art world.

Spielberg liked the script and considered producing the film.  But he worried it would dishonor Holocaust survivors, so he passed.  In order to secure financing for the film, Cusack waived his salary.

Despite mostly positive reviews, Max was barely noticed at the box office.

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Leelee Sobieski – The Idol – 2002

Sobieski also starred in the French film, L’idole (aka The Idol)

Sobieski played a free-spirit who befriends a retiree played by James Hong.  So basically, a French version of My First Mister.

Sobieski speaks fluent French.  She learned from her father who lives there.

Sobieski also provided a voice for one of the call-ins on Frasier.  The radio spots were usually done by celebrities.

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Leelee Sobieski – Dangerous Liaisons – 2003

In 2003, Sobieski starred opposite Catherine Deneuve, Rupert Everett and Nastassja Kinski in the French TV mini-series,Les Liaisons Dangereuses.

The mini-series is yet another adaptation of  the classic eighteenth-century novel of the same.  In the US, the novel has been adapted into both Dangerous Liaisons and Cruel Intentions.  This adaptation was set in France in the 1960’s.  Sobieski played the role Uma Thurman played in Dangerous Liaisons.

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Leelee Sobieski – Hercules – 2005

In 2005, Sobieski appeared opposite Taylor Lautner look-alike, Paul Telfer, in the TV mini-series, Hercules.  Seriously, that’s not the Twilight guy?  I would have lost that bet.

The cast included Elizabeth Perkins, Sean Astin and Timothy Dalton.  It also had the kind of CGI you expect from a Hallmark mini-series.

It’s time to start the “Rock Bottom Watch”.  Call it when you think we’ve hit Rock Bottom.  Believe it or not, the forgotten Hercules mini-series ain’t it.

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Lying – 2006

In 2006, Sobieski went indie.  How indie?  She co-starred opposite Chloë Sevigny in a movie written and directed by someone named M. Blash.

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Leelee Sobieski – In a Dark Place – 2006

Sobieski had a busy year making movies you have probably never seen or heard of.  She starred in the low-budget horror movie, In a Dark Place.

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Leelee Sobieski – The Elder Son – 2006

She co-starred in the dramedy, The Elder Son.

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Leelee Sobieski – Heavens Fall – 2006

And she played a woman who accuses nine black men of raping her in the Old South in Heavens Fall. Timothy Hutton and David Strathairn co-starred.

Four movies released that year and not a single one made it to theaters in the US.  Is that Rock Bottom?  Oh no, silly reader.  We’re nowhere near Rock Bottom yet.  Sobieski did appear in one movie that received a theatrical release in the US in 2006.  That movie was…

Leelee Sobieski - The Wicker Man - 2006
Leelee Sobieski – The Wicker Man – 2006

In 2006, Sobieski made her triumphant return to the big screen opposite Nicolas Cage in Neil LaBute’s remake of the cult classic, The Wicker Man.

Cage plays a cop (as only Cage can) who goes to a remote island to investigate the disappearance of his daughter.  The island is inhabited by a bizarre cult of women led by Ellen Burstyn.  Sobieski has a small role as one of those crazy cultists.

The remake of The Wicker Man received terrible reviews and flopped at the box office.  But you already knew that.  You knew that because the movie has become infamous for being so-bad-it’s-good.  

Rock Bottom?  Don’t kid yourself.

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Leelee Sobieski – Walk Over Me – 2007

In 2007, Sobieski starred opposite Battlestar Galactica‘s Tricia Helfer in the sex farce, Walk All Over Me.

Sobieski played a meek girl who assumes her roommate’s (Helfer) identity in order to make a few bucks to pay the rent.  Her roommate’s profession is that of a dominatrix –  a career which requires fewer credentials than one might think.

So, the direct-to-video S&M comedy has got to be Rock Bottom, right?  Hold on, Cheech.  It’s coming…

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Leelee Sobieski – In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale – 2007

Sobieski also starred opposite Jason Statham in Uwe Boll’s adaptation of the video game, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale.

Statham’s character is named Farmer.  He was adopted by his village.  Anyone want to bet against my theory that he is actually royalty?  Ray Liotta played an evil wizard who has imprisoned Sobieski – and not in a good dominatrix kind of way – and is using her magic to amass an army. John Rhys-Davies played Sobieski’s father.  Matthew Lillard, Claire Forlani, Ron Perlman and Burt Reynolds also cashed paychecks.

Oh man, where do you start with In the Name of the King?  How about with director Uwe Boll?  Boll is considered by many to be the worst director working today.  He has made a career primarily of adapting video games into direct-to-video movies.  He even offered to fight his harshest critics in a boxing match in what many believed to be a publicity stunt.  Some of Boll’s opponents who took him up on his offer claimed Boll intentionally mislead them into thinking the fight was all for show and then pummelling them in the ring.

Boll sponsored a charity event on the set during filming.  He gave visitor’s access to just about everything which greatly upset Liotta.  Liotta has criticized Boll for letting so many spectators on the set during filming.  Boll originally wanted Kevin Costner for the lead role.  According to Boll, Costner declined because he didn’t want to have to film the action scenes and instead offered to let Boll direct Mr. Brooks.

The film was shot in 2005 but was not released until 2007.  The script development, believe it or not, took over a year.  Over 80% of the script had to be rewritten because of similarities to the Lord of the Rings trilogy.  Despite the fact the movie had wrapped filming two years prior, Boll continued editing the theatrical cut up until 8 hours before the premiere.  He personally flew the print from Vancouver to Los Angeles.

Burt Reynolds extensively rewrote his death scene.  Amazingly enough, Reynolds in his lengthy career had never died on screen before.  So he wanted to make his first time something special.  Don’t we all?

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Leelee Sobieski – In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale – 2007

Kevin Smith and Juliette Lewis were filming on an adjoining set and came to visit. Reynolds claimed to see them steal two boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts.  That sounds completely credible.  I’d watch my Krispy Kreme’s around Kevin Smith if I were you.

The movie had a production cost of $60 million dollars.  That’s not counting marketing which is one of the most expensive costs of releasing a film.  It grossed less than $3 million dollars in the US and just over $13 million world wide.  That is what you call a bomb, folks.

Reviews were as bad as you would expect.  The film was nominated for five Razzie Awards, including Worst Picture, Worst Screenplay, Worst Supporting Actor (Reynolds) and Worst Supporting Actress (Sobieski), and Boll for worst director which he won.  Believe it or not, Boll released a sequel in 2011.  How the hell did he manage to do that?

So, this is what Rock Bottom looks like.  Kubrick to Boll in eight years.  What the hell!?!

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Leelee Sobieski – 88 Minutes- 2007

In 2008, Sobieski starred opposite Al Pacino in John Avnet’s thriller, 88 Minutes.

Pacino played a forensic psychologist with a record for helping put serial killers behind bars with his testimony.  On the day one such man is scheduled to be executed, Pacino receives a call informing him that he only has 88 minutes to live.  The movie’s gimmick is that it plays out in real time.  So it takes Pacino exactly 88 minutes to solve the mystery.  Thank goodness it wasn’t called 120 Minutes.

88 Minutes reunited Sobieski with her Joan of Arc director, Avnet.  Avnet replaced the original director, James Foley.  The movie was scheduled for release in 2005 but was shelved for three years because that’s what happens to movies this terrible.

Reviews were terrible and the movie disappointed at the box office.  Pacino and Sobieski were both nominated for Razzies.

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Leelee Sobieski – Finding Bliss – 2009

In 2009, Sobieski starred in the romantic comedy, Finding Bliss.

Sobieski played a wanna-be filmmaker who starts working in porn when she can’t get a job making real movies.  Hi-larious!

The movie was originally developed as a series at Showtime.  Kind of like Weeds but for porn.

Leelee Sobieski - Night Train - 2009
Leelee Sobieski – Night Train – 2009

Later that year, Sobieski starred opposite Danny Glover and her Joy Ride co-star Steve Zahn in the mystery-thriller, Night Train.

Glover played a train conductor who along with two passengers discovers a dead body in possession of diamonds.  They make the perfectly rational decision to dump the body and keep the diamonds for themselves.  Yeah, nothing can go wrong with that plan.

I don’t know about you, but it seems to me like Glover is getting too old for this shit.

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Leelee Sobieski – Public Enemies- 2009

Sobieski ended the year with a small role in Michael Mann’s crime drama, Public Enemies.

The film starred Johnny Depp as John Dillinger and Christian Bale as the FBI Special Agent  who pursued him.  Sobieski’s role is a tiny one, but at least it wasn’t a Uwe Boll film.

In 2009, Sobieski met and married  fashion designer Adam Kimmel.  Sobieski later shared that she remained a virgin until her wedding day.

 “I guess 26 is kind of old to lose your virginity, but it was important to me that I remained a virgin until after I was married. It wasn’t for any religious reasons or anything like that, but simply because, to me, my virginity was the most precious gift that I could ever give to a man, and I wanted to be sure I was giving it to the right man.”

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Leelee Sobieski – Acts of Violence – 2010

In 2010, Sobieski starred opposite Ron Perlman in the thriller, Acts of Violence.

I haven’t seen Acts of Violence.  But based on the title, I’m going to assume it is about puppies, no?

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Leelee Sobieski – Drop Dead Diva – 2010

Since then Sobieski has been popping up primarily on TV.  In 2010, she appeared on the Lifetime Network’s Drop Dead Diva.

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Leelee Sobieski – The Good Wife – 2011

In 2011, she appeared in an episode of The Good Wife on CBS.

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Leelee Sobieski – NYC 22 – 2012

In 2012, Sobieski was part of the regular cast of the CBS cop drama, NYC 22.  13 episodes aired before the show was cancelled.

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Leelee Sobieski – Branded – 2012

Sobieski also starred in Russian–American science fiction film, Branded.

Sobieski played the niece of a high-powered marketing executive played by Jeffrey Tambor.  Together with one of Tambor’s new employees, Sobieski discovers a conspiracy that allows marketing to control the world.

Reviews were terrible and the movie was a bomb.

So, what the hell happened?

How did Hollywood’s Golden Girl of 2000 end up making movies for Uwe Boll?

Well, first of all, despite what Sobieski may have said to Movieline, it turns out there weren’t enough good roles to go around.  Natalie Portman was snatching them up and went on to stardom while Sobieski was left cobbling together a career out of her leftovers.

Sobieski had a very small window in which to become a household name.  She needed to capitalize on the success of Joan of Arc.  If either Joy Ride or The Glass House had been successful, Sobieski’s career might have played out differently.  But instead, when her chances at mainstream stardom fizzled out.  She retreated to France, indies and television.

On the upside, Sobieski is still a working actress.  I always feel compelled to point out what an accomplishment that is.  Although her chance at superstardom has come and gone, she can probably look forward to a long career of doing television and direct-to-video movies.  She may even make small appearances in big screen movies like she did in The Wicker Man and Public Enemies.

Plus, her name is fun to say.  So she’s got that going for her.  Which is nice.

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Jeff Wilder
10 years ago

In some ways, she kinda fell victim to the fact that the star system was coming to an end as she broke through. She lost most of the good roles to Portman, Katie Holmes and others.
Speaking of The Wicker Man, I think Neil Labute (and John Singleton) would be a good subject for a betrayed by column. Both go from making edgy stuff to making commercial pablum.

Terrence Clay (@TMC1982)
Reply to  lebeau

12 Ridiculously Sexist Movie Scenes That Prove Hollywood Hates Women: http://whatculture.com/film/12-ridiculously-sexist-movie-scenes-that-prove-hollywood-hates-women.php/5 Any Scene Where Nicolas Cage Assaults A Woman – The Wicker Man The Scenes: While investigating the disappearance of a young girl, cop Edward Malus (Cage) seemingly can’t stop himself from attacking women. The most notable instances include punching Diane Delano’s character in the face completely unnecessarily, kicking Leelee Sobieski’s character into a wall (after she admittedly attacked him), and running around in a bear suit, at which point he then punches another woman. Why It’s Sexist: A lot of critics believe that director Neil LaBute has a problem… Read more »

Brad Deal
10 years ago

You make it sound like a 30 year old girl is washed up. I would not be too surprised to see her shine in some future role/s. Conversely, she may choose to devote her time to her marriage. Who knows, but she appears to be a very articulate, intelligent young woman.
She should be proud of what she has accomplished.
Great review.
Brad Deal

Shemp
10 years ago
Reply to  Brad Deal

Mr. Deal: Just my interpretation: I don’t think LeB is necessarily calling Ms. LLS “washed-up.” This IS, after all, WTHHT — wherein the Collective We look at actors whose careers at one time seemed swell and then, for assorted reasons, not so swell. Going from being promising/up-and-coming actress to appearing in garbage such as “88 Minutes” and anything directed by U. Boll Weevil is NOT a good sign for ANYONE. LLS can still bounce back, no doubt about it — but another shot at the brass-ring of A-List Stardom? If Hollyweird isn’t going to give the time of day to… Read more »

Shemp
10 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

And by “Hollyweird” I refer to the producers and studio big cheeses that “determine” who gets considered for roles and who does not. I don’t know if there is a “blacklist” in Hollywood (not a LITERAL one) like some stores that sell/trade used CDs/records do (months ago there was a sadly funny article on the InterWeb about a store in Chicago and their “list” of artists’ CDs that are NOT to be bought/traded for resale by store employees) but I wouldn’t be at all surprised. (I’m sure “word has gotten ’round” that dealing with Myers, Heigl, and/or Kilmer is more… Read more »

Brad Deal
10 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

If it seems like I am trying to defend her it may be unconscious. She reminds me of my daughters. They work hard for their achievements and deserve their accolades. It would be different if she were some train wreck like Lindsay Lohan. Five pages of critique and two sentences of redemption provoked my parental defense mechanism. Can’t help it.
One a side note, after reading these articles, it appears that most actors careers are filled with mostly stinkers, rather successful movies. If so, than how does the industry stay afloat?
Brad Deal

Brad Deal
10 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

Don’t over react. I am a casual observer who likes movies and am interested in the mechanics of their production and the participants. My response is based mostly on my emotions. I found nothing mean spirited in your article and found it to be exactly as you intended. Fun and informative. If I had the time I am sure I could critique your take on Leelee and slant it one way or another. But my critique would be fake and contrived. Everything I read about Leelee indicates she is a good person. But in the end, you do make sound… Read more »

nickofthyme
8 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

“But pointing out the reality that any actor is lucky just to be working isn’t as much fun as talking about Kevin Smith stealing donuts.” Great writing!

Terrence Clay
10 years ago

Why is Leelee Sobieski taking minor roles on The Good Wife? http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=593026 #10 Sobieski had some flops (Wicker Man, The Glass House, 88 Minutes), and she grew out of the jailbait appeal she had going for a while. Basically, she had some buzz for a bit, but it didn’t translate to Box Office numbers, and that’s what really counts. #14 She was the latest It Girl back in 1999-2000 with the Joan of Arc miniseries, Joy Ride, My First Mister and Eyes Wide Shut. Then she was in a bunch of movies that did pretty terribly and she stopped being… Read more »

Terrence Clay (@TMC1982)
Reply to  Terrence Clay

Charts & Graphs: The top 10 movies from the weekend of September 14, 2001: http://thedissolve.com/news/3194-charts-graphs-the-top-10-movies-from-the-weekend-o/#comment-1585995160 I feel like she was going to be a big thing; then she turned out to be not a very good actress, or at least movie star. I guess I always just associate her with 88 Minutes and Never Been Kissed. Of course the latter, which I hate with the fire of a thousand suns, just makes me think of “The Pretty Ugly Girl” trope from Not Another Teen Movie and how Ally Sheedy played it so much better in The Breakfast Club and how… Read more »

Terrence Clay (@TMC1982)
Reply to  Terrence Clay

Convince us that your most disliked movie us the worst film ever made. http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=18776719&postcount=62 In The Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale might be Uwe Boll’s worst film, even though it was his first with a budget and actual name actors. That distinction alone might get it close to winning this thread. From my review here, upon first seeing it: Quote: Originally Posted by OneCentStamp OK, I’m returning to report, having seen this film in the theater. First off, it’s bad. It’s weapons-grade, enriched bad. It’s bad on rye with a side of cole slaw. It’s not as… Read more »

Terrence Clay
10 years ago

Whatever happened to Leelee Sobieski’s career? http://popwatch.ew.com/2008/01/11/leelee-career-w/ I like to think I’m a relatively astute entertainment junkie. I try and pay attention to “the haps” in the showbiz world. (After all, that’s what they pay me for.) So how did I miss Leelee Sobieski’s career downward spiral to second billing in an Uwe Boll flick? That’s right, she’s in this weekend’s In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (pictured), which will — if it follows suit with every other Boll movie — be on the short list for worst film of the year. There was a time… Read more »

Shemp
10 years ago
Reply to  Terrence Clay

Ya know what, Mr. TC? You bring up some darn good points…my 2 cents: Sometimes it just comes down to LUCK. Kath Heigl was a C-list actress at best (with lots of experience) but she got onto a hit show (“Grey’s Anatomy”) and a hit movie (“Knocked Up”) and was an IT GIRL until she released her Inner B8tch and starred in bombs….now it’s back to TV for her. If one or more of Ms. Leelee’s more “visible” movies had been a HIT, it might be different for her…but then, if the queen had balls she’d be the king. But… Read more »

Dorian
Dorian
10 years ago

Great entry.
I´m 45 and I completely fell in love with Lelee after seeing Joy Ride and Glass House.
Because of her, I punished myself watching In a Dark Place from star to finish. What an awful piece of s***!
To make that crap worse, someone told me the brief nude scene was not done by Lelee, but for a body double.

Shemp
10 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

re: But she took the high road – albeit one that involves making comedies about porn and dominatrices without nudity. INTERESTING turn of phrase [I’m being playfully sarcastic] about the “high road” — she’ll appear in CRAP MOVIES and doesn’t mind viewers THINKING that’s she’s actually nude, but “employing” a body-double for the actual nudity! Heaven forbid she does STAGE WORK (you know, Albee, Shakespeare, that kinda stuff) that requires ACTING and NO NUDITY at all, right? It’s like when some actresses — koff koff koff — portray strippers “at work” but never show any, uh, skin. I was thinking… Read more »

Shemp
10 years ago

PS: For some reason my insertion of “Jessica Alba” did not “take” above…I mean koff Jessica…etc.

Danielle Charney
Danielle Charney
10 years ago

I am going to get jumped on for damn sure- but I have found her to be a total bore- and all the attention to her to be from her provenance – we were all told how great she was etc- I am not a Helen Hunt fan either and actually cannot stand looking at either one of their faces- to me they are both in the Lucky Hall of Fame- along with so many others- the only films I’ve even liked Hunt in were ones where she was playing against real talent that made her look great- other than… Read more »

Liz
Liz
10 years ago

Oh happy days. . .! 🙂 I realize that it’s completely inane to be commenting on an article that I have not yet read, but I could barely contain my excitement over your “return”, LeBeau. 🙂 While David does a fine job on his articles, his write ups are void of the humor and wit you seamlessly and expertly interject into your WTHH articles, which I’ve missed and, really, have made WTHH what it is. I hope you’ll still be making VERY regular contributions to WTHH, Toto shout outs and all. 🙂

David
10 years ago
Reply to  Liz

Lol I’d like to think they aren’t void of humor, I just have a different sort of understated approach to things. I’m still working out the kinks of injecting humor with the endless amount of information. Apparently I still have a lot to learn

Liz
Liz
10 years ago
Reply to  David

Oh David, please don’t take offense! I worried while commenting that you might misinterpret my fondness of LeaBeau’s style of writing for a dislike of yours but please don’t. My partiality for LeBeau’s way of weaving a story into his postsis in no way a reflection of YOUR way of writing. Like you said, you just have a different approach to things, which certainly doesn’t mean BAD unlikeable or boring. Not at all. So, please don’t take my comment personally, okay? 🙂

David
10 years ago
Reply to  Liz

It’s ok, I don’t take offense that easy. I have my own style, and I’m pretty new at this. It’ll flow better once I get some experience. At this point I’m mostly just trying to replicate the style and format and put my own love of pointless knowledge in it. But my humor is a very dry irony, it’s just my style. And you know, diff’rent strokes etc.

Brad Deal
10 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

I saw Toto 30 years ago in Fresno, California. They were great then, and their great now!
Brad Deal

Dorian
Dorian
10 years ago

Hey LeBeau, another great article! One thing though – I’m sorry if someone already pointed this out – halfway through the Deep Impact part, you say Elijah Wood played Tea Leoni’s son. That is incorrect. Leoni’s character had no children. In fact, their characters had absolutely nothing to do with each other, if I remember correctly…
Another thing, completely off-topic, since the new lay-out of the site, it’s not fit for proper mobile viewing anymore, which really sucks because I always read your blog on my phone…
It’d be great if this could be fixed, thanks!

Dorian
Dorian
10 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

It’s perfect again, thank you!!

Terrence Clay (@TMC1982)
Reply to  Dorian

Speaking of Tea Leoni, she’s another person who I can see get a WTHHT down the line:
http://uproxx.com/webculture/2013/04/where-the-cast-members-of-all-3-jurassic-park-films-are-now/2/
Tea Leoni (Amanda Kirby – Jurassic Park III)
Prior to and following JPIII, Leoni’s career has borderlined on mediocre (The Naked Truth, Fun with Dick and Jane, Ghost Town). It’s as if God has been punishing her for that awful hair in the third film. She was last seen in the 2011 Eddie Murphy bomb, Tower Heist. Eesh!

Terrence Clay (@TMC1982)

Should Tea Leoni have had Julia Roberts’ career?
http://www.runango.com/forums/topic_show.pl?tid=131337
By adamswims
Date 2010-03-29 7:10 PM
I think she squeezed out a couple of pups and that has sort of slowed he ascension. Julia has somewhat been on the backburner as well after doing the same. Tea is much nicer to look at and I think she’s a good enough actress. She just hasn’t gotten the big break like Roberts did with Cinderella Hooker….I mean Pretty Woman. Did anyone think of Roberts as a great actress until Erin Brockovich? No. She’s still not a great actress. Bankable, yes….but not great.

Bryan O'Connor
Bryan O'Connor
10 years ago

The first time I saw Leelee in a movie was JOAN OF ARC. I didn’t intend to watch it, but as soon as she came on I couldn’t turn it off. The next time I watched a movie of Leelee’s was 13 yrs later in JOYRIDE. I couldn’t understand why she wasn’t in more movies or had more star power! So I did some research, mostly reading her interviews, movie reviews, watching some of her movies and doing searches on the net putting her name with negative references, but I couldn’t find anything that she had done that made her… Read more »

Eric
Eric
10 years ago

She could always play the lead in a Helen Hunt biography!

Terrence Clay (@TMC1982)
Reply to  Eric

Blink And You Miss ‘Em: Celebs Who Were Famous For, Like, Five Minutes:
http://www.vh1.com/celebrity/2014-05-13/celebs-whose-fame-didnt-last/
In the late-90s, Leelee Sobieski was a much-feted teen actress (because she was damned talented, not because she was a dead ringer for Helen Hunt). She burst on the scene in Deep Impact, mesmerized us in Eyes Wide Shut, and won a Golden Globe nomination for the TV movie, Joan of Arc. But she hasn’t made any noteworthy films since her millennium-era reign — instead she’s become a bit of a fashion icon, posing front row at couture shows, and swanning down Met Ball red carpets.

Jackson
Jackson
9 years ago

The YouTiue clip of Les Liaisons Dangereuses.is in German (dubbed), not French. Can people really not tell the difference between French and German?

Terrence Clay (@TMC1982)

Never Been Kissed 15th Anniversary – topic deleted?
http://officialfan.proboards.com/thread/497057/never-kissed-anniversary-topic-deleted
Post by Milkman Norm on 5 hours ago
Is Leelee Sobieski still around? Has she done anything in a decade?

joboots
joboots
9 years ago

Let’s bid Leelee a happy 31st today!!!!

Calan
Calan
9 years ago

I think when you have baby most of times Hollywood doesn’t want you anymore. Unless they can make it into the second coming for media spread. For me I don’t think most people in hollywood should have children most suffer. there exceptions though. With Neve, some things I never knew about but in reading she like Kate Hiegel watching in early careers and later on. And Lee Lee had this presence I don’t be here. Attitude. This sends out vibes to supposely fans why I don care about her anymore. Neve might as well stay cold england I don’t anybody… Read more »

Bo Lee
Bo Lee
9 years ago

“Deep Impact was one of two movies released that year about comets destroying the earth. Tea Leoni played a brilliant scientist chosen to carry on the human race should civilization be destroyed. Elijah Wood played the son of another scientist who would be spared. Sobieski played Wood’s girlfriend who was not selected to survive. Someone really needs to review the selection process. Do we really want humanity to be carried on by hobbits?” Actually, I was thinking someone really needs to watch the movie before talking about it. Tea Leoni played a news journalist who discovered the secret of the… Read more »

Ryan
Ryan
9 years ago

That’s Craig Ferguson, not Craig Kilborn.

Sheryl kanzulak
9 years ago

ok, too many pictures and old info — why didn’t you answer “what the hell happened to her’?? I like her so much more than Jennifer Lawrence – ick!! Can you even really answer? or was this all just fluff?

daffystardust
Editor
9 years ago

I suspect that you may not have read the entire article. It is broken into 9 parts. Click on the box with the “9” in it at the bottom of the text next to the word “pages” and you can read the end of the article if that is what you are most interested in. That is where Lebeau suggests the reasons for the subject’s cooled career.

msrccl
msrccl
9 years ago
Reply to  daffystardust

I read all of the parts – a waste of time – i didn’t care to see all of that -when I went through all of the pics with all of their info – I didn’t care about that — I just wanted a good, quick update of what happened. I still do not know — the last thing I saw was another story about another person – no end to LeeLee’s story —

daffystardust
Editor
9 years ago
Reply to  msrccl

Did you read this part? “So, what the hell happened? How did Hollywood’s Golden Girl of 2000 end up making movies for Uwe Boll? Well, first of all, despite what Sobieski may have said to Movieline, it turns out there weren’t enough good roles to go around. Natalie Portman was snatching them up and went on to stardom while Sobieski was left cobbling together a career out of her leftovers. Sobieski had a very small window in which to become a household name. She needed to capitalize on the success of Joan of Arc. If either Joy Ride or The… Read more »

msrccl
msrccl
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

Not her past, not her achievements, just what she is doing these days and if she is acting in ANYTHING….

E
E
9 years ago

Elijah Wood did not play the son of a scientist, he was the scientist that discovered the comet in Deep Impact. Do you watch the movies that these actors are in. This is not the first mistake I have read in your blog.

Craig Hansen
Craig Hansen
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

I wouldn’t expect Lebeau to have seen every movie in every actor’s filmography, that would be several hundred movies he’d have to watch, including plenty of obsure films with tiny bit parts in their early careers. And I think I know Lebeau well enough to know that if he had to watch someone’s films before writing them up then there is no way in hell that LeBeau ever would have written up Steven Seagal. Lebeau is willing to suffer only so much for his art.

Craig Hansen
Craig Hansen
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

Hey you got it, I just got bothered when I saw E knocking you and I had to come to your defense a bit. It’s clear to me that you put an immense amount of research into each of these articles, and minor errors may occasionally happen, ones that you happily correct when brought up. And by the way, I take pleasure in the fact that it was I who initially recommended Seagal as a WTTH candidate, a one-time action star that was one of the biggest douches to make a name for himself in Hollywood (he almost makes Chevy… Read more »

Brad Deal
9 years ago
Reply to  Craig Hansen

Craig, I find most of your comments exceptional and entertaining, buttt I must take exception when you compare the talentless Segal to the gifted Kilmer. Where Seagal is a misogynist and brute, Kilmer is a perfectionist and a little nuts. There is a world of difference between these guys. Thems fightin’ words……And Chase, who cares?? Kilmer is one of my favorite actors, and Seagal is actively avoided. Maybe we need a new category: WiSH? What Shoulda Happened? Seagal would be at the top of the list. I can see it now, Val Kilmer as Doc Holiday at the bar downing… Read more »

Brad Deal
Brad Deal
9 years ago
Reply to  E

E, I noticed in your comment you left out the question mark at the end of, “Do you watch the movies that these actors are in.” Besides ending a sentence in a preposition, you fouled up the punctuation… Look to your own abilities before you cast dispersions on LeBeau, and by association all the highly qualified and competent men and women who truly appreciate his efforts. Part of the fun in a blog like this is being able to share one another’s ideas and critique their comments without malice. It requires maturity and compassion to participate. “If you never make… Read more »

Craig Hansen
Craig Hansen
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

We’re a tight community here. And Lebeau makes the least amount of mistakes of all of us, so we look up to him.

Craig Hansen
Craig Hansen
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

I have a new hero then. All hail Daffy!

Brad Deal
9 years ago
Reply to  Craig Hansen

All hail Daffy!

daffystardust
Editor
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

Well that’s flattering, Lebeau, but we all know it’s not true.
My singing voice is probably only very good.

Craig Hansen
Craig Hansen
9 years ago
Reply to  daffystardust

You’re too humble, Daffy. We all know angels weep whenever you sing. Talented, and humble. I like that.

daffystardust
Editor
9 years ago
Reply to  Craig Hansen

We all have our wonderful strengths. For his part, Lebeau is always so fantastically complimentary.

daffystardust
Editor
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

Well…she puts her milk before her cereal, doesn’t she?

Brad Deal
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

At least you get cereal…

j
j
9 years ago

Aww I thought this was a joke but look at all these comments. You poor people need things to do!

Craig Hansen
Craig Hansen
9 years ago
Reply to  lebeau

Nobody likes a party pooper.

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