Weekly Recap: Princesses Kissed Frogs and Danced With Beasts
For a blog with contributors who are largely middle-aged men, we spend a lot of time talking about Disney. This week, a sizable portion of the conversations centered on Disney princesses. After viewing the live-action remake of the animated classic, Beauty and the Beast, Daffy reached out to me to ask if I had seen it. I hadn’t, but when Daffy calls I go into action. Once we had both seen the movie, we exchanged a few emails which became the basis for one of this week’s articles. Daffy pulled everything together and added pictures like the one above which served as an illustration to a joke I made about how my date for the original movie likely viewed me. But he didn’t stop there. To cap things off, Daffy also arranged for LeFou to handle recapping duties this week. So without further ado, here is LeFou.
Thanks, Lebeau. Gaston and I are big fans of Le Blog. We read it every day. Or more accurately, I read it to him. Gaston’s not big on the reading. We especially enjoyed your conversation with Daffy about the new version of Beauty and the Beast. I liked the movie, but I just don’t see Josh Gadd playing me. I would have gone with Ryan Gosling, but I guess he wasn’t available. We also liked Kevthewriter’s article about why The Princess and the Frog bombed. Why? Because any movie Gaston doesn’t appear in should bomb. Although Gaston wanted me to pass along a message to Tiana that if things don’t work out with Naveen she should top by the tavern. Naveen, if that happens, call me!
Someone we may be seeing soon is Daffy Stardust. Readers may have noticed that he will soon be leaving on his 83rd trip to Disney World. This week, he posted an unboxing video for his new Magic Bands which guests can use to redeem FastPasses for attractions in the parks. But there’s no FastPass available to meet with Gaston. So you’ll just have to wait in line like everyone else, Stardust! Later in the week, Daffy wrote up a list of things he planned to do for the first or last time. Although a visit to Gaston’s tavern wasn’t on the list, don’t be fooled. He’s always milling about looking for a Lefou’s Brew. Last time I had to cut him off which is weird because the drink it’s a non-alcoholic beverage. Some people can’t handle their frozen apple juice.
Lebeau wanted me to make sure to mention Jestak’s daily birthday articles. I’m not sure why seeing as how Gaston’s a May birthday. Whatever. If you want to know which famous people celebrated a birthday last week, here’s the list of headliners:
- March 20: William Hurt and Spike Lee
- March 21: Matthew Broderick and Timothy Dalton
- March 22: Andrew Lloyd Webber and Stephen Sondheim
- March 23: Keri Russell and Joan Crawford
- March 24: Jessica Chastain and Steve McQueen
- March 25: Aretha Franklin and Elton John
- March 26: Diana Ross and Keira Knightley
Okay, he’s not Gaston but I do like that Steve McQueen!
When you get past the Disney content, a lot of the articles at Le Blog this week were decidedly PG-13. That’s because several of the week’s Movieline articles came from the March 2002 issue which was the publication’s 10th Sex Issue. The randiness started with a poll in which readers were asked to pick the movie with the most seductive scene. And the readers’ choice was… Risky Business. An excellent selection. Tom Cruise on that train! I’m getting flush just thinking about it!
Moving on, there was an article about how the studios manufactured bombshells during the Golden Age of Hollywood which is fine if you’re into that sort of thing. Gaston just looked at the pictures like he always does. Then there was a cover interview with Julianne Moore whom I have never heard of. Is she a singer of some kind? An article both Gaston and I liked was about sex in foreign cinema. Look, we may be Disney characters, but everyone knows the French do it best. Finally there was something about the drug problem in Hollywood circa 1992. Young Hollywood did drugs? Who knew?
Well, it’s almost time to get back to the tavern. Gaston’s due for his hourly foot rub. Before I scamper off, I have to mention this week’s Walking Dead recap. You know who would be good in the zombie apocalypse? Gaston! Although I do like that Negan fella too. And finally, Lebeau wrote some more about his Lego toys. When is that guy going to grow up? This week he wrote about some old TV shows from the 80’s. I think there’s like one guy who even reads those articles. He should devote that space to writing about tall huntsmen and their sidekicks.
So that’s it for me this week. Next week, you’ll be stuck with your usual overgrown man-child. How I pity you.
Next week: Possibly the site’s first-ever article on wrestling, more Movieline, Walking Dead, Legos and celebrity birthdays and probably a lot less LeFou. There aren’t any Disney articles planned as of yet, but don’t be surprised if one or two drops between now and then.